The Wife and Children That Never Existed There was a version of my life where you were my wife Not in reality Not on paper Not in promises But in my mind completely I imagined waking up next to you years from now. I imagined small arguments about silly things. I imagined laughing in the kitchen. I imagined you calling me by my name in a softer way than anyone ever has. I imagined protecting you. I imagined working hard, becoming successful, building something big just so I could say, You don’t have to worry anymore. I’m here I imagined children A daughter who had your calm eyes A son who had your quiet strength. I imagined holding them and thinking, She gave me this life I imagined school meetings Family photos Festivals together Growing old beside you I imagined everything But here is the truth that hurts the most You never agreed to any of it You never said you wanted that life with me You never promised to be my wife You never dreamed those children ...
You once said something to me that never really left You deserve better You did not say it in a harsh way You were not angry or frustrated You said it softly like you were trying to protect me For a long time I believed you I did not question it I did not argue I just accepted it like something that feels right but still hurts a little But silence makes you think a lot And the more I thought about your words the heavier they started to feel Because if I really deserved better why was that better never you That is the part I could never understand Because I never saw you as something less I never stayed because I was scared of being alone I never chose you because I had no other option I chose you because I wanted to Not loudly Not desperately Just clearly I chose your calm nature I chose the way you stayed quiet when things got hard I chose your distance even when I did not fully understand it I even chose the parts of you that did not let me in completely And I was okay with ...