FROM LOVE TO GOODBYE WITHOUT A BEGINNING

 

the silent goodbye of a one sided love

some stories do not end with a big moment

no magic no twist
just a quiet goodbye
between two people
where one heart felt everything
and the other never knew

i liked her

she was never mine
she never gave me a sign 
but my heart still chose her
not because she was perfect
but because she was kind
focused
real

the way she talked
the way she studied
even the way she said okay
it felt special to me
even if it was just normal to her

i waited for those replies
like they were gifts
like they meant something more
but deep down
i knew they did not

she liked someone else

i saw it
i knew it
mayank

she smiled at him
laughed with him
looked happy with him
and i was just there
quiet
watching
wishing

i never wanted to take her away
i never wanted to disturb her peace
i just wanted to be in her world
even if i stood at the edge

a world in my mind

so i made my own world
in that world
she looked at me
she smiled at me
she picked me

but that world was fake
Just a soft place i made
to hide from the truth

a place where love felt possible
even when it was not

she wanted peace

she told me
she wants peace
she wants space
and i understood

she was tired
she had enough
and my feelings were heavy for her
even if i never meant to make her feel that way

i asked to be friends
she said she wanted distance
i respect that
even if it hurts

i cannot keep waiting

this is how it ends
no big goodbye
no last moment
just a quiet decision in my heart

i cannot keep dreaming alone
i cannot keep waiting for something that will never happen
i do not want to be anyone’s second choice
i want to be someone’s first
someone who chooses me freely

so i choose peace
for me
and for her

a real goodbye

dieu
if you ever read this
know i will never make things uncomfortable for you
you do not have to avoid me
you do not have to explain anything
you never gave me false hope
it was my own creation
my own silent dream

you were kind
you were special
you helped me grow
but now it is time for me to let go

i am unfriending you
not because i am angry
but because i want to protect you
and protect myself

whenever i see you
my emotions overflow
so i need this space
i need this goodbye

i hope mayank makes you smile
i hope your husband love you more than i loved you
i hope you stay the same strong focused sweet girl
and if one day
you ever wonder
was there someone who cared silently

yes
it was me

this is the end

from the boy who dreamed too much
who cared silently
who waited quietly
but now walks away
for peace
for healing

goodbye dieu
not with hate
but with love that now sets itself free

– SACHIN LAMESH

NOTE;- 

lesson from my story is simple but deep love should never come from fear or imagination when you create your own meaning in someones kindness you only hurt yourself respect what is real accept when someone does not feel the same and never try to hold someone who does not choose you freely do not lose your self respect do not change your values for anyone and do not let your heart live in a world that does not exist choose peace choose clarity and choose yourself before it is too late

- sachin lamesh